Wednesday 1 August 2007

I CAN BE SERIOUS

I have just finished my evening rounds on the ward called BLOG. And it has come to my attention that a few people are beginning to think I can not be serious so in an effort to disprove these allegations, I am now going to be serious.


For example, right this minute I am SERIOUSLY looking for Super.

I am also SERIOUSLY thinking that betty's sagoma may be stronger than mine and yet I gave mine six "road runner" chickens- you know the ones that you can never catch when you run after them (now don't tell me I am the only one who runs after chicken!!!!)


I am also SERIOUSLY thinking that tonight I might just take my first glass of whiskey. I am told it cures many ailments. Right now, NASA are ringing me off the hook trying to learn my secret- yaani, I am launching rockets faster than drunk NASA pilots can say "guilty as charged."

I am also SERIOUSLY thinking that I can not be a housewife- couldn't go to work today- due to activities in my chest area and therefore spent a good part of today sleeping and at the same time watching day-time television- I AM A WOMAN I CAN MULTI-TASK. Why can't I be a housewife.................I would need a husband in order to accomplish that small task. No, seriously day-time telly was seriously boring.

I am SERIOUSLY thinking that the lady who served me chicken fillets at a BBQ maybe responsible for my not being 100%- yes, infact she may well be. I was psyched up for nyam chom and you failed to deliver. Now you, I need to invite to a REAL BBQ. Allow me to school you.
Please God let me feel better tomorrow. Yes, I love my sleep but I can't sleep properly when I know I should be at work. And I know how much my "customers" will be missing me but I can't sing with this voice................I am not Mahlia Jackson.

I am SERIOUSLY thinking that if I can't be at work tomorrow, I need to start drawaing up my teaching plan for Bible school for next semester. Will you shut your mouth- yes, I teach Bible school.(on Tues/Wed nights) SEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, I can be serious. Nope even them at Bible school think I am crazy.
Do you think that maybe it was coz my mum used to tell me while I was growing up (not that I have stopped), but she used to tell me to eat the head of the fish because it would make me clever. QUESTION- aren't fish like really forgetful that is why they can stay in a fish bowl/tank, coz by the time they swim from one end to the other and back again, the have forgotten they were there before and they think they are in an ocean and all those people looking in on them have drowned!!!!!!. Now how does eating the head of a fish make me clever? Mum, remind me to have this discussion with you when I get to Heaven.

And now I am SERIOUSLY thinking that I am going to leave a random question for a random blogger at the end of every post. Seriously starting now;

Betty- Kwa GP ni lini? ( and you though I had forgotten)? Remember I ate the fish, I am not the fish.

49 comments:

Anonymous said...

@3TOC....pole. get well soon.

Prettylyf said...

Get well soon!

lol@fish not been bright

Unknown said...

LOL Trust me you are the only person I know who chases after chickens. now don't go taking whiskey we are very afraid me the consequences

Anonymous said...

SHOOOT, DID I SERIOUSLY HAVE TO HAVE THE FIRST RANDOM QUESTION??

ATI I CHUCK CAPS COZ AM SERIOUSLY SCREEMING??...WHAT CAPS??

SUPER I SERIOUSLY THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STAY AT HOME..MY HOME, WHAT U DOING HERE SO FIRST??

SAGOMA NDIO NINI?DO I HAVE THOSE?? KEEEUUULLL..YESSS MINE ARE SERIOUSLY STRONGER!!BE AFRAID, BE VEEERY AFRAID.
IS SAGOMA A TUMBO? LOOL SIILLY SERIOUS DENTIST!!

SERIOUSLY,TAKE THE WHISKEY..PLEASE. LOL THAT WAY WHEN YOU BLACK OUT FROM DRUNKEN CONFUSION I WILL JUA NEVER TO TOUCH THAT STUFF EVEN THOUGH AM SHOOTING SPACE SHIPS..NO, ROCKETS.

BIBLE SCHOOL? *hand over mouth*..DEAR GOD SHE'S SERIOUSLY LYING TO YOUR CHILDREN!! LOOOL OK AM JOKING.

ATI I CHUCK CAPS?? ..AAARRRGG,SERIOUSLY WHAT CAPS??

FISH HEAD..YOURS IS A FISH HEAD AMA YOU ATE FISH HEAD-THE REAL THING??ATI BOTH? SERIOUSLY!!!

I AM LIKE SO SERIOUSLY NOT SEEING A GP.DUUUH!

Three types of Crazy said...

@super---HEY, lost and found.yaani,I missed you mpaka I fell sick. Ebu report to work-INEXES has infact lost the plot!!!!

@prettylyf- trying to get well like yesterday but there is a way the cocktail of medicines I have mezad has shocked the body. I am alert like a cockroach when light comes on.

@kirima-kwani your chicken don't run?

@seriously betty-of course you had to get the first question and maybe you will get the second and third ones too.

And here is the second one, did you steal the whiskey?????what caps?you are asking me about caps when I am very fragile and hence causing me to think that I am CRAZY.Where, who, what CAPS?

Bomseh, help betty etti Sagoma ndio nini?Betty which type of "doctor" might you need to give chickens, maybe goats nakathalika!

Anonymous said...

youve told betty to to to GP many times this GP is what ?? in my hood GP is a ka old town called Grand Praire TX ..google it So when we have to kamada pints

ama I am not supposed to jua?siri ya jikoni ama izzhow

Anonymous said...

SEROUSLY?? My PA-to-be drinking?? coooooool. hope it will oil your thinking that i need to reap of that thong...

gishungwa said...

Hope you are better. I used to teach Vacation Bible school and am a certified Sunday school teacher. I would recommend though that you pass on the whiskey.
You will soon be well.

eddiie said...

Remember I ate the fish, I am not the fish.......hehehehe...i thought you were to be your own fish....

Oh you be the fish and i be the eater...LOL......

eddiie said...

I am also SERIOUSLY thinking that I can not be a housewife- couldn't go to work today- due to activities in my chest area .....................

That was bad...Oh my good to become a housewife is so bad...

Aki i have heard Kenyan men butter their wifies for dead..Am not sur eof this but may be you can watch your moves aki..

Don`t come complaining to the blogging community..

I would prefer you ....anyway am goin too much,,..am i not..

LOL....

eddiie said...

And now that SERIUOSLY......... good arrangment of mawords i swear..

feather said...

HAVE YOU WATCHED NEMO, REMEMBER THE BLUE FISH THAT KEPT FORGETTING STUFF. YOUR REMINDED ME OF THAT/

Half 'n' half said...

seriously what is Sagoma?
hope you enjoyed Cuando Ces Mia! ama whatever mexican soap they have there! Feel better soon! Otherwise I will feel too guilty taking your bribe!

Unknown said...

Sangoma's = Witchdoctors down south

Anonymous said...

Seriously.....are you serious? LOL!

Anonymous said...

You must SERIOUSLY like fish too much.

I believe that Kirima is impersonating Bomseh but he's right on point on the Sangoma thing.

Klara said...

Si I believe in u..U can get serious at times!! si now u are being serious! :=)
Get well soon! & Let da whiskey flow!! LOL

Anonymous said...

Get well soon and try the whiskey

Kip said...

Is sogoma = quacamole or it means illegal immigrant ?

3N said...

3TOC you are really crazy, all the same I can seriously help you on the small taks of a huzie. and what is sogoma, betty??

Anonymous said...

(whistling long and hard) phee, woo, wooo, woo, wooo, wooo, wooo, woowowo WOH!

Anonymous said...

Hi Dorie, [that fish someone mentioned somewhere]. First sorry that you were ill. Whiskey, si waeza jaribu, lets see what happens, just hide car keys kwanza, we do not want you going to attempt to drive your moto gari over the Thames, bila using the bridge, then, what is that you say about being an odijo. For actual people, who wanajileta? oh dear! oh carrots! oh crumbs! Someone save the innocents! That reminds me, of charmed, used to be a nice show...now did you know which part of the fish was the head, i do not do fish, does that make me smarter than you all fish eaters? huh? Hehehe!! other than those huge eyes...how the heck do you eat a fish head?...and the first person to say soup gets smacked upside their heads. Fafanua.

Archer said...

What blog ward rounds? You missed one patient!

Perhaps I'm slow, but which rockets are these you're launching? Is it what I think it is?

Yes you're the only one who chases chicken. Kina Kirima's are so co-operative they even tilt their shingos...

Now this gets interesting...YOU? Teaching Bible school? Are you sure those toiz are NOMO? (look who's talking, I taught Sunday school for 4 years and I have the big framed certificate to show for it!)

you two shrubometers, it's SANGOMA, not sagoma. Eish! I thought the U.K would have chanushad peeps but evidently it hasn't!

Archer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

archer-eish!! i was quoting her and she said 'sagoma'.

loooool Aegeus..@ hi Dorie.

DORIE(3TOC)..ooooh lol now i jua what Sangoma is.
I STOLE THE WHISKEY, COME WE SHARE.

caps!!!

Three types of Crazy said...

@kip - GP- GENERAL PRACTITIONER/DAKTARI

@inexcess-are you suggesting that my thinking needs oiling?

@gish- vacation bible school teacher huh? Now I know whose brain to pick.


@eddiie- I didn't mean being a house wife is a bad thing, I mean it is just not for me right now(digging myself out!- how am I doing?)

@feather- I LOVE finding Nemo (I cry each time I watch it- should I admit that!)

@2halfs-ata kama nii kiifu, I am bribing you.kama mbaya mbaya!

@kirima- ebu tell them.

@mocha-u like grey's anatomy?seriously!

@bomseh - can u tell?

@klara-I chickened out of tasting the -OH group.

@be silent- see above.

@kip- sagoma is sangoma is see kirima.

@3n- ebu see above.

@modo- hatu jamaliziana?

@agiasi - soup

@archer-LOL atii Kirima's chicken do what? Hiyu nii genetically modified?
which rockets are you thinking of? the LOUD, COUGHS THAT JUST SOUND LIKE SOMETHING IS TAKING OFF!

My bible school students are mostly grown ups as in few 30 somethings most above that.Yes sometimes even I wonder what exactly I am doing.

I am working on reducing the shrubs- it's not working.
ps. do u have two blogs? I am so confused.

@betty- caps ziku wapi?

Anonymous said...

Yes I have two blogs. www.midnightfrisco.blogspot.com is my former digz which I'm now converting into a photo blog, and my current digz is at www.mwanamishale.wordpress.com (just click on the link above) feelanga free to spread some madness. Kwanza is Dorie short for Dorcas?

egm said...

Seriously, pole kwa kusikia less than nomo. Seriously, samaki rocks! Seriously, that kichwa has got nyamas you go digging for, bwana Aegeus! And seriously, you are seriously crazy!

Anonymous said...

no we hadn't...

pole kwaja kwa ugojwa...si tulikuambia usile anything...haiya...

yep tyhese be one huge ward kule mathare...

WAIT!, bible class...oh lodidodi you are sending them kids halfway to hell...LOL!

betty kelele mingi wacha...caps off! as for aegeus we ndio clown fish nini...heheh at dorie...

egm, i don't think she can feel any less than nomo...she's already three times less than nomo...

Anonymous said...

Dorie, hello again, tihii, SOUP, now msiba wa kujitakia...and all that, if you go fishing on the thames catch a shoe and think its a fish and drink its soup, why in hell do we say eat soup, anywho, lost track again, then egm and modo, oh and Dorie, i shall take any fish you put in my vicinty, cooked or in the various states of decay i shall take it and tenderize it on various parts of your anatomy, and FYI Grey's Anatomy rocks!

Jayn Sean said...

I was really enjoying this until i got to the part ya your mum in Heaven!

...felt really bad! How did you fell after writting that line? Is she really in Heaven? I mean like late?..you know i just joined you and i donno some lil things about you.Please dont tell me to go to the beginning of the blog? Yes or no?

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& am SERIOUSLY lovin ur blog even though i just landed 4 the 1st time here.

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